Boris Johnson’s cake delusion

Jon Danzig |

When Boris Johnson became Foreign Secretary shortly after the referendum, he promised that Britain would get a great deal with the EU after Brexit, “of huge value, possibly greater value” than being a member of the EU.

In an exclusive interview with The Sun published on 1 October 2016, Mr Johnson declared that he was confident Britain could get a deal with the EU, “that is exhilarating for this country, that is a massive opportunity and that liberates us to champion free trade around the world.”

He added that Britain’s exit deal would, “make Britain once again the great motor of free trade.”

He said:

“We are going to have a deal that works.”

In the middle of the interview, Mr Johnson burst into a Bob Marley song and sang:

“Don’t you worry about a thing cos every little thing is gonna be all right.”

Boasted Mr Johnson:

“Our policy is to have our cake and eat it”

He added:

“We are Pro-secco but by no means anti-pasto”.

This is typical of Boris’s bluff and bluster. He cannot possibly deliver what he gleefully and recklessly promises.

It’s utter nonsense for Mr Johnson to claim that the UK could have a better deal with the EU as an ex-member, or that Britain and Britons would be better-off as a result of Brexit.

  • OUTSIDE the EU Britain will lose all its current trade agreements with over 70 countries across the world that we helped to negotiate through our EU membership, with more on the way.
  • OUTSIDE the EU Britain, being smaller than the EU, is unlikely to negotiate new free trade agreements with other countries that are as good as, let alone better than, the ones we already have. In any event, it will take years to find out.

(Mr Johnson has never explained how British trade agreements would be better than EU ones.)

  • OUTSIDE the EU, Britain – and Britons – will lose a say, votes and vetoes on the running, rules and future direction of our continent. We’ll only be able to look on as decisions are made without us – even though those decisions will affect us just as much, whether we are a member or not.
  • INSIDE the EU we can have the best of all worlds:

– Frictionless trade with our most important international customers and suppliers in the world, right on our doorstep, where almost half of all our exports go to, and just over half of all our imports come from.

– And trade with countries across the world, often through excellent EU free trade agreements, such as with Canada, Japan and Singapore. Germany exports far more than the UK to India, China and other fast-growing countries – the EU does not stop them. On the contrary, the EU facilities such international trade.

For Mr Johnson to have claimed that we can enjoy “greater value” EU membership benefits as an ex-member is a whopper of a lie.

Bigger even than the lie emblazoned on his battle bus during the referendum, which falsely claimed that Britain sends the EU £350m a week which could instead be spent on the NHS.

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Two weeks after Mr Johnson sang to Sun reporters, “Don’t you worry about a thing cos every little thing is gonna be all right”, EU Council President, Donald Tusk, gave a keynote speech in Brussels in which he dismissed Boris’s ‘cake and eat it’ fantasy.

On 13 October 2016, Mr Tusk said:

“The words uttered by one of the leading campaigners for Brexit [he meant Boris Johnson] and proponents of the “cake philosophy” was pure illusion: that one can have the EU cake and eat it too.”

Said the EU Council President:

“To all who believe in it, propose a simple experiment.

“Buy a cake, eat it, and see if it is still there on the plate.”

He added:

“The brutal truth is that Brexit will be a loss for all of us.”

Mr Tusk went on to say, “There will be no cakes on the table. For anyone. There will be only salt and vinegar.

Said Mr Tusk, “If you ask me if there is any alternative to this bad scenario, I would like to tell you that yes, there is.”

It was “useless to speculate” about a soft Brexit, he said, as this would be purely “theoretical speculations”.

Said Mr Tusk:

“In my opinion, the only real alternative to a ‘hard Brexit’ is ‘no Brexit’. Even if today hardly anyone believes in such a possibility.”

Mr Tusk confirmed that the EU would conduct the Brexit negotiations in good faith, defend the interests of the EU 27, minimise the costs and seek the best possible deal for all.

“But as I have said before, I am afraid that no such outcome exists that will benefit either side.”

He concluded:

“Of course, it is and can only be for the UK to assess the outcome of the negotiations and determine if Brexit is really in their interest.”

Almost three years later, with the negotiations now concluded but with our Parliament at stalemate, and with no credible plan ahead, it’s clear that most people in Britain don’t think that Brexit is in the country’s best interests. (See

Today, Boris Johnson’s fantasy cake is mouldy and stale.

The Prime Minister wannabe no longer talks about achieving a better deal with the EU as an ex-member – instead, he threatens to yank the UK out of the EU without any deal at all.

Despite the government’s own assessments which detail that leaving the EU without any deal will plunge the country into chaos.

But Boris doesn’t do detail. Boris does bragging, boasting, braggadocio and buses. He should not be let anywhere near Brexit. With him in charge, “Everything’s NOT gonna be alright”.


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